"And He said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities,
that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
2 Corinthians 12:9
(KJV)
I don't know about you, but I cannot comprehend that today is the last day of 2015!
Honestly, I don't know where it went.
Each day sort of seems like a big blur to me now.
It was a hard year for us.
I've mentioned that more than once here,
and you may be a bit weary of hearing it.
There are parts I'd rather not disclose,
and, for months, I have hesitated to talk about the part I am getting ready to share.
Through my hesitation, God has nudged me from time to time,
that this part is something that needs to be said,
because, perhaps it can bless someone else and give them hope to see how He has tunneled a path through our circumstances.
So, here it is....
Our Identity Crisis
laptop on lap, and I began to file our taxes online.
We have done it this way for years, and we have never experienced any issues,
so I assumed that this year would be no different.
I worked through the amazingly easy process of online tax preparation, and I hit send, like always.
Soon, I heard the little beep alerting me that an email had come through.
And, there it was.
Those dreaded words.
I don't remember the exact wording, but, in a nutshell, this is the gist of what I read,
"The Internal Revenue Service has rejected your tax return.
The reason is that taxes have already been filed in your name and social security number..."
Blah, blah, blah, after that....I didn't care to read the rest.
I felt sick.
My head reeled.
It felt like my blood pressure spiked.
What?!?!
How?????
Aren't we always very careful?
So mindful of our privacy.
Never taking risks.
Putting safe security measures in place.
My "what?" and "how?" questions quickly changed to "WHO????"
Who would do this to us?
I felt so violated.
Our carefully-shielded privacy felt so invaded upon.
My stomach was in knots.
I picked up the phone.
And this small act, my dear friends, was the beginning of one of the most frustrating, aggravating ordeals I can describe to you.
To spare the mundane details, I found it near-impossible to speak with an actual human being.
I so wanted an answer!
That night.
Right there.
The suspense was near-unbearable.
I didn't want to have to wait until morning to hear an explanation of what had truly happened.
Finally, I reached a human voice, who informed me that, based upon the wording of our email from the IRS, our identity had possibly been stolen, but, he couldn't tell me anything for certain.
After realizing I was pretty much wasting my time by trying to get a definite answer, I politely said thank you, good-bye, and hung up.
Early the next morning, I quietly slipped out of our house, without waking my dear husband who had worked all night or Zach, who was still sleeping, and I drove over 60 miles to the closest office of the Internal Revenue Service.
I got my little number, and I sat and waited for a very long time to see a representative.
All the while I waited, I convinced myself that there had been a mistake.
That the rep would tell me this was all a fluke,
that everything was fine,
and our personal identity was safe.
After a few hours, I finally saw my number pop up on the flashing sign,
and I found that I was being called to Cubicle Three, where I was met by a very kind,
quiet sort of guy, who, though he was kind, was very non-committal and professional, to a fault.
I explained my plight, and I waited for him to tell me everything was going to be okay,
that nothing was amiss,
that this was all a bad dream,
and I could wake up to "normal life" now.
Alas!
This was not the case.
He looked at everything I had brought with me,
listened to my sad tale,
pulled up several things on his computer,
and commenced to tell me that it looked like our taxes had already been filed on January 29th,
six days before I tried to file them on February 4th!
But, how, I asked him?
And, by whom?
I don't know if you have ever had dealings with an IRS worker,
but trying to wrench information out of them is like trying to pull an eye tooth right out of their strictly-business head!
This man, however pleasant he might have been, was NOT budging.
He was not telling me anything.
I pushed the envelope just as far as I dared,
and then I surrendered.
He wasn't telling, so I may as well stop wasting my breath.
All he would truly reveal is that someone had indeed, beat us to the punch, and already filed OUR taxes before we could file them, in hopes that they would get our refund!
He told me to go home, make some very specific phone calls,
including a call to our local law enforcement to report this crime,
and to bring Kevin back with me as soon as possible.
This journey began our quest to prove that we are who we really are.
Oh, my word!
I find that in "my words" I have no words...to describe the level of despair one can reach while trying to prove that they are who they really are.
For sake of time and length, I will leave out the gory details,
and I will focus on what this whole ordeal has taught me.
I am Cheryl Smith.
But, Cheryl Smith is not who I really am.
My social security number is what it is.
But, my social security number is a mere series of nine numbers,
doled out to me by the United States of America government when I was a little girl,
and those nine numbers do NOT define me.
The name my parents gave me, at birth,
and the last name I was given the day I stood at the altar in front of a preacher when I gave up my maiden name and took on Kevin's last name, is only a means of "identifying" me, in this life.
If I were to enter some government protection program, or for some other reason I took upon a whole new name, it would have no bearing upon who I really am.
Because who I really am...that person inside of me....that soul that God placed there - the part of me that will return to Him when I die, has nothing whatsoever to do with the first name, Cheryl, or the last name, Smith.
Trying to prove that I am Cheryl Smith was one of the worst nightmares I have walked through.
The grief of being denied the hard-earned tax refund that Kevin labored so hard all year to receive
was beyond telling.
Feeling like we had been violated and that someone else was going to get what was rightfully ours was extremely hard to endure.
But, through it all, God showed me that I am who I am, no matter what.
That He doesn't identify me as Cheryl Smith.
That Cheryl is just a name to identify who I am, in this life.
That this life isn't the life that really matters.
That one day, He will give me a new name in Heaven,
and that is the name that counts.
"Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.
To the one who is victorious, I will give some of the hidden manna.
I will also give that person a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it."
Revelation 2:17
I, at times, have fought a lot of ill feelings towards whomever it was that inflicted these burdens upon us.
They will more than likely never know how much anguish they have caused.
I won't bore you with the ordeals we have endured trying to remove weird things from our credit report and trying to fix the mess they have created.
God showed me, at some point, I can't even remember when,
that I must forgive.
That I must pray for the perpetrator(s), and realize that because of what they did,
my family and I have learned some of the most valuable lessons of our lives.
There was a moment in time, when victory came, my anger subsided, and then turned to gratitude.
To God be the glory.
To God be the glory.
During the pounding of the storm, and even in the aftermath,
we have learned to lean hard upon God.
To dig deep for who we are....not as defined by this life,
but who we are IN HIM....
who He created us to be.
I want to share some of the highlights of our lessons with you,
in hopes that these facts will comfort you in your own struggles and whatever you may be facing.
Lesson #1:
We will always be who we are in Christ,
regardless of what happens to our "identifying factors" in this life.
No one can steal that, take it away from us, or assume it as their own.
It is ours...our own...our individual inheritance that cannot be touched or destroyed by anything or anyone in this life.
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to His abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you,
Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time."
I Peter 1:3-5
Praise God!
I don't know about you, but that part about "an inheritance, incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in Heaven for you" just thrills my inmost soul!
Our true identity...that person we really are...is "kept by the power of God",
and bless His holy name, even satan himself cannot pluck us out of His hand!
Jesus said,
"And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish,
neither shall any man pluck them out of My hand."
John 10:28
Lesson #2:
There is not much we can count on in this life as being a sure thing,
not even a tax refund that has been duly-earned, fair and square,
but God, Himself, is going to take care of us, no matter what.
God doesn't need.
He doesn't require the government or the most "sure thing" in this life
to fulfill His purpose and to supply our needs.
Lesson #3:
God's friendship is one that is deeper than all others.
He sticks closer to us than even a brother, and the precious Holy Spirit is a Comforter that never fails.
Lesson #4:
God is a jealous God.
"For thou shalt worship no other god: for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God..."
Exodus 34:14
He wants to be our "all in all".
He doesn't want us to depend upon our own safety nets,
whether they be financial, physical, or spiritual.
When we do this, we are leaning to our own understanding,
and we are putting our trust in our own devices,
making them our "gods" and sources of deliverance and sustenance.
When we do this, we are leaning to our own understanding,
and we are putting our trust in our own devices,
making them our "gods" and sources of deliverance and sustenance.
The strongest, most dependable of human safety nets and back-up plans can fail.
When we reach the end of our own resources, He hasn't yet begun to unveil His.
Lesson #5:
There are certain situations in this life that are completely beyond human help.
There are circumstances that require a genuine miracle to change,
and nothing short of Divine intervention will do.
There came a day when all was cleared, the government finally believed that we are who we are,
and the monies owed to us were released.
They even paid us a little interest!
Oh, how we rejoiced when the storm was over!
There were a lot of tears and there was a lot of praising going on in our house that day,
I can assure you!
2015 has been mostly uphill, but mingled in the physical ailments,
the identity crisis, the spiritual battles, and other fiery trials, with the accompanying fears and tears,
God has blessed us again and again.
And He has proven Himself faithful to us.
He has absolutely convinced us that He is our all in all.
That if we have Him, we truly have all we need.
That He keeps His promises, and we should keep ours to Him.
Truly, on this last evening of the year, I have never known Him better or loved Him more.
He is...
My Strong Tower.
"For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy."
Psalm 61:3
My Defender.
"Do not move an ancient boundary stone or encroach on the fields of the fatherless...
for their Defender is strong; He will take up their case against you."
Proverbs 23:11
My Rock.
"Trust in the LORD always, for the LORD God is the eternal Rock."
Isaiah 26:4
My Healer.
"I am the LORD that healeth thee."
Exodus 15:26
My Redeemer.
"This is what the LORD says-- your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: "I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go."
Isaiah 48:17
My Savior.
"...my spirit rejoices in God my Savior..."
Luke 1:47
My Provider.
"And Abraham called the name of that place Jehovah-jireh.
As it is said to this day, In the mount of Jehovah it shall be provided."
Genesis 22:14
My All in All.
"And when all things shall be subdued unto Him, then shall the Son also Himself be subject unto Him that put all things under Him, that God may be all in all."
I Corinthians 15:28
(Emphasis added.)
I close out this year and look forward to the new one ahead with the assurance that God is enough.
He is sufficient.
When all else fails, and when hope is gone, He remains.
Steadfast.
Unmovable.
Unchangeable.
Everlasting.
He is sovereign.
He is God.
He is Lord of all.
He means everything to me.
Praise His name forevermore.
****************************************************************
Now, for the fun stuff....
we came across several more little items to give away!
Hooray!
There are lots more, too....
but, I had better put them on in batches, so I don't overwhelm anyone.:~)
I know you're tired from all of the Christmas shopping,
but this shopping trip will not weary you, I promise!
No tired feet.
No long lines.
No cranky customers.
No money required!
All you have to do is click your mouse here to be redirected to our
Here's a quick preview of what you will find available tonight!
Just click on over, pick out some stuff you want,
email and let us know, and Lord willing, it will soon be on its way to your mailbox!!!
What could be easier?
I hope to see you there, and I can't wait to share!